LOSERS AND THIEVES by LEYTON CASSIDY

I am a Sarah Lawrence girl who loves Sarah Lawrence girls. Many of us do– we love to love each other. Staring over sociology books, all of us in love with whoever we find looking back. We keep secrets under a cherry blossom tree that’s no longer there. We huddle under the sculpture rumored to be built by Yoko Ono, the truest Sarah Lawrence girl. We all move to New York City– except for one of us who fell in love with a Barnard girl and left us– and meet up on rooftops like young adults are supposed to do. We go to each other’s shows, and hold each other in clubs. Some of us are not girls. We are boys, we are both, we are neither at all. We have all been bitches; some of us are from LA.

We’ve shoved mysteries into each other’s mouths on a dance floor, spilled beer on each other, and held back each other’s hair. We drive each other to the airport, we don’t show up. We cheat on each other, in a variety of ways. We lean into each other, talking about our old teachers and the tribes they made. Little cults of thought, obsessed with one book, all together. We’ll cut our hair, we’ll grow it out. Many of us were raised Catholic. Too many of us are white. Our mothers think that our armpit hair is a statement, but we just honestly forgot. We are medicated. We are therapized. We ended up here for some reason.

We’ve all found ourselves thinking about poetry and hating ourselves for being the type of people who think about poetry. None of know what we are going to do. We will make the sad art of the world. We will make you cry. We will make you laugh, and then you’ll go home and really think about what we said and then cry. We will tear couples apart. We are riot girls and we are scholars; we are counselors, losers, bartenders and thieves. We are not the best and we are not the worst. We don’t want to keep anything to ourselves. We flip our underwear inside out and wear it again.

We’ve all wanted to kill ourselves, and some of us have tried. Don’t worry though, Sarah Lawrence girls always cancel plans.

 


Leyton Cassidy is a queer writer and podcaster living in New York City. She is a graduate of Sarah Lawrence College where she studied literature and theatre. She is the producer on the new podcast Gay Future, and is a crisis worker for the Trevor Project. She has worked for shows such as Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, Sesame Street, The Break with Michelle Wolf and her work can be seen in Entropy Mag, Bustle, The Weekly Humorist and others. Find her on Twitter and on her website.

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